Some shonky photos from a dangerous midnight liaison, not as dangerous as the night club where I got a nose bleed and 2 black eyes. For those not in the know (as I wasn’t) a bike derby is where you ride round and knock people off until someone’s left riding. Sounds OK in concept but on concrete with lots of drunk single speeders even the local yoof just watched from the sidelines while this years bike porn was discarded to make way for the latest sparkley thing next year.

We spent a couple of days watching the 4X and DH (no not the XC, how hypocritical) and seem to have less idea of what went on than most people that weren’t there - but we can tell you what line everyone took over a certain section, having spent the DH wandering around the middle of the course.
It was a day for crashes and breakages all round with lots of scuffed riders coming down, a few flats, chains off and someone had their butt hanging out of a skin suit. Steve Peat apparently managed to have his saddle snap on the gondola on the way up. A couple of people managed to crash in front of us.

1.Here’s David Vazquez Lopez making for the dirt.
2. Neil Donoghue surfing the mud.
3. Dan Atherton going for a no footer.

Predictably the Tour has descended into farce yet again, and after such a nice sunny start in London too. One by one the big names are dropping as the positive tests keep coming and it’s obvious that no-one can be trusted.

It’s not even as though they are doing it in a subtle way. Rasmussen, notably dire against the clock, produced an amazing time trial in stage 13 which saw him lose only a small amount of time to the winner, Vinokourov [results on cyclingnews.com]. “You can trust me”, he had said during interviews on the first rest day when asked about doping, prompting an old associate to go public about vials of cow medicine. Ras-moo-sen’s defence since then has been to remind the world that he has had 14 negative doping tests in this Tour, but then of course someone in his position wouldn’t be so careless as to have anything show up in tests.

Unlike Vino that is. In a Landis-style comeback Vinokourov went from losing almost 30 minutes to the leaders on stage 14 to winning stage 15 in spectacular style. Unsurprisingly there came shortly afterwards a Landis-style announcement of a positive doping test, this time for homologous blood transfusions rather than Landis’ testosterone irregularities. The “good doctor”, his suspicion-laden “coach” Dr Ferrari didn’t bat an eyelid though, posting on his website 53×12.com “In a breakaway for 140 km, he [Vinokourov] passed over the top of the Port de Bales with a 6 minute advantage on the yellow jersey group and lost only 30 seconds over the last 40 km, basically riding alone”. Mmm hmm.

The main thing I have got out of all this (as if I needed reminding) is that when a top pro says they are clean, they are probably lying. Maybe some aren’t but they are trailing round somewhere near the back of the field like Bradley Wiggins and David Millar. It reminds me of a TV programme I saw a few years ago, when Louis Theroux hung around with some body builders for a few weeks. Even though there was a Clean Mr Universe competition, and a plain old Mr Universe competition, the non-clean competitors just couldn’t bring themselves to say publicly that they doped. They used every euphemism possible but wouldn’t acknowledge publicly that they were injecting all sorts and I am sure it’s the same in pro cycling, they just can’t bring themselves to accept what they’re up to. Even when they get caught it’s all still the same old “suspicious French testing lab” excuses and denials.

We didn’t see much of the action as it happens, we were right next to the course but facing the other way showing off all our wheels, tyre sealant and the rest. But we do know that there was some high quality racing going on with Mary McConneloug flying in from the US to win by quite a way in the womens, and a sprint finish in the men’s race between Oli Beckingsale and Ian Wilkinson which was only ever going to be won by “Wilko”. Actually I’ve just checked the lap times and Mary McConneloug would have probably won the Expert or Masters mens race, and would have beaten half the Elite men too. Very quick, probably helped by her special issue 296g NoTubes rims - I had a quick heft of her spare wheels and they were unbelievably light.

Then the rain came down for the Masters/Vets etc and I was glad I wasn’t racing for once, it looked pretty bad from under the cover of our canopy. The rain returned for Sunday and the Marathhon events, and I think it broke quite a few people (and bikes). Will Bjergfelt had to go and buy some shoes as he forgot his (again) but still managed to win, at least that’s what we were told, I’m afraid we’d left by then as the rain came down even harder.

A quick plug for the slightly nutty event thats just opened on our online entries system, the Raasay Rumble, a new ten hour mountain bike enduro race on the isle of Raasay for soloists, pairs and teams of three. See this months MBR for some pics or the their website for some info, but thats about all we know or just enter here….